The Evil Dead Cabin

For the better part of the past few months, I've been workin' on this little ditty for this little contest.
You buy the shell and dress it up how ever you want.
Most of the furniture is bought except the couch.  I made that, the curtains, the reel-to-reel, and the Book of the Dead.

So, without further ado, may I proudly present to you, "Ash's Cabin: In The Off Season"....uh, in one inch scale....

Yes, I realize it's missing a porch. I'll get back to that.

I have most of what I need to build the porch but had to sacrifice a porch swing chain for the cellar door and I felt the interior was a bit more important before the deadline.
So, we'll see what happens a little later and...y'never know, maybe Ash will even show up.

1000 Places To See

My mom got us this book a few years back.

I just went through it the other day with a highlighter and a pen and marked all the ones we've been to already.
Out of 1000.....I'm going to say maybe 970 entries are actual places.  The remaining are "local eateries" or "art scene" or "music scene" or "romantic hotels" type entries that cover a handful of places.
Out of those 970, I have about 70 of those highlighted as places we've been to.  Either one or the other or both of us.

Region not even touched: Great Plains
All the other regions are pretty evenly spread with us living in the southeast and traveling up the east coast pretty frequently.  Also, with the inlaws in the mid & southwest.  Recent trips to Alaska and Hawaii kinda round things out, too.

I also think we need one that covers the world....not just the States and Canadia.

Which reminds me.....
Also a few years ago, I bought a wall sized map so we could pin it with our adventures/places we've been to.
Matt's parents have one that I've always loved looking at and I wanted to do one just for us.
So I have the map, but still need to find a big cork board to mount it on and start pinning.
Sounds like a good weekend project, no?

Bellyboobs Final

You turds remember this?

I finished up that bad mammajamma before Xmas and had it at the New Year's soiree that Martha didn't attend.
Here's the finished product that should be meeting it's maker very soonly:

The Packer Panda

As most of you know, I married into a Green Bay Packer family.  And some of you long time brainure readers know that I make these panda heads.

So this year, for Christmas, I've made my father-in-law a Packer Panda.

It looks like this:

And I don't have to worry about him seeing this before Sunday because he's not on facebook and doesn't read this (thankfully).
And I know Matthew and MICK won't forward this to anyone, right Mick??  ;)

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE EVE, TURDS!
Be careful out there, kids.
Enjoy time spent with those you love & don't ever take it for granted.
I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmahanukkwanzaakuh!!

WTH Weds - The Belly Cast

This is my friend, Martha, when she was preggers with her 2nd boy.

And this is her boobs/belly cast that she gave me to make pretty.

Grady (the boy that was in there) was born at the end of Aug.
Which means I've had this thing for like 3 months almost and have only sanded and primed it.
Every time I look at it, all I can see is a frog face.
And nipples.
Martha said, "no pressure" when she dropped it off, but I'm feelin' a little bit o'.
We'll see how it goes....

YouTubesday - HouseholdHacker

YAY!!

Sunday Confession - Juicer

I did not juice today but this is usually what our breakfast looks like in the mornings before it gets pulverized:

I think it looks like hippo food.

Suckit Saturday - An American Wedding

Remember these fine folks?
Turns out they're gettin' hitched this afternoon!!
And look at how fuckin' cute their invites are!

LOVE it!

Remember last year, when I made a couple of garters for my lovely friends who were gettin' hitched then?

Well, had to dust off the old sewing machine and crap and threw this one together & felt like it needed matching earrings to go with it.

Yes, there are bananas on it.

Man, I'm gettin' good at these things.

Maybe someday I'll make a whole bunch and sell them (that was the idea a year ago).

-ANYWAY-

Cheers to the happy ass couple!!

Now maybe you guys can do some planking!  :)

It's Curtains For You!!

I made these with discounted fabric from the halloween print inventory at Joann's.

So now its less bright/hot in here those 2 hours before sunset.

No more easy bake oven home officey room.

No more ghetto sheet hung by two nails either.

Yes, I'm aware they only cover half the window.

That's what I wanted them to do.

Because the light isn't as harsh due to the other half of the window being tinted for some reason (was like that when we moved in).....plus the view is better from that half.

Painted Skulls

Matt & I have also been working on these.
Dia de los Muertos style.

Piles of Homemade Teeth

This made me laugh the other day.
Just sitting nonchalantly on our dining room table.

Panda Heads

You guys remember this?

I've been making these fuzzy guys in batches, so I've been pretty busy with those and will have news to share with you later.
Hopefully by the first of October (fer sure).

Stupid Bugs & Garters

A couple weeks ago, I had a cold.
It looked like this:
It was super annoying and kept me from finishing up Mexico blogs.

In other news, I made this garter for Chrystal's wedding coming up in November. :)

Its on my jeansed leg so I could see how it would lay when worn.
Turned out nice, right?

I'm going to make a few more at some point and will have big news to announce.
More later!!

Here's Your Sign

I've been stuck in the office for the past couple of weeks waiting on a new laptop to come in cuz my old one decided it didn't want to work anymore and IT wouldn't support it because it was 5+ yrs old and out of warranty.

Working from home has spoiled me, as naturally you would expect.

At home, I can have whatever music or movies I desire playing in the background without anyone asking me to turn it down or having to worry about any potential HR issues.

At the office, I wear headphones. The earbud kind.*
I've noticed that the headphones also help my concentration when working on whatever tedious project is on fire at the time.

The past couple of days, there have been visitors stopping by my desk to chat or just say hi, while said headphones are on.
These people have been talking at the back of my head & then, upon realizing there's a headphone thing going on, they then proceed to wave their hand in my face to get my attention so they can be heard.

So I've made this sign for folks approaching my cubicle with idle chatter:

I've stuck it up with a catbutt magnet set hairball magnet and included some fine print.
Every good sign has fine print.
_____________________________

*I don't like the word "earbud" so they're headphones. "Earbud" makes me think of "earwig" which makes me think of Wrath of Khan.
KHAAAAAN!!!

How to Make Your Own Pillory (or stockade)

1. First, it's important to stay hydrated since you'll be working outside. Ask Miller Lite & Michael Jackson for assistance with this.

2. Draw out your idea. Remember to be precise & include measurements.

3. Make sure your tools are charged up so you don't have to sit around & wait when you realize that BOTH drill batteries are completely dead when you're halfway through getting a 2inch screw in. (Michael Jackson can also help here).

4. Build this piece. Which is just 2 boards with circles cut out and then fastened together with 4 other boards.
The lid to a tequila container makes for good hand holes. The lid from the cooler (that we also used for Big Asspirin) was useful in making a good sized head hole.

5. Lay out your pieces for what its gonna stand on. Make sure its at the height you want it before screwing it all together. Keep short friends in mind.

6. Nail everything together at least 6 times. Not just because you want it somewhat sturdy, but also because you love your nail gun. Take leftover cut out scrap pieces of wood that you keep stepping on and nail those up there too (where the hell else are they gonna go? - be resourceful!) Stand that shit up and admire your homemade medieval torture device.

New Living Room

Before.

After.

Before.

After.

Change is good.

The Evolution of A Living Room

OK...so we're gonna go on a journey backwards through time.

Father's Day

Thinking of making a new father's day card line.
For those that aren't quite sure of what to say.

Here's what the one I sent to my father looked like.

-----------------------------------
As a side note - I hope that all you dads....y'know, the cool ones.....I hope you're having a kick ass father's day.

Crazy Week of WrapUps

Here's my to-do list for the week and what I've accomplished so far:

1. Clean Fish tank
2. Vacuum --DONE
   
3. Bathrooms --DONE
   
4. Finish Laundry --ALMOST DONE
   
5. Clean out my car....meh, this one can wait til after we get back.
   
6. Fix Toilet --DONE
   
7. Pack
8. Power Adapter
9. Drop off books for Chrystal
10. Print Airline tix
11. Line up ride to airport --DONE
12. Cat-sitter
13. Eat up all perishables in fridge. --ALMOST DONE
    

I'm trying to get all of this done before we leave for Amsterdam on Friday and get all my work stuff wrapped up, too.
Mom offered to come over and clean (she says, "I know its not your thing.") while we were gone which is super nice but without having done some of what I did, it would've been slightly embarrassing and too much for her to do. I've left all the dusting for her and am leaving little notes written in said dust on the end tables and stuff so it'll be fun at the same time!!

Organization/Focus Follow Up

I just took an ADD quiz on psychcentral.com and it spit out:

This was the longer quiz - 24 questions instead of just 6 like what the short quiz has. The short 6 question quiz spit out:

It took me about an hour to finish the 24 question quiz cuz I'd forgotten that I'd gotten to that page after clicking and opening about 6 other browser tabs and posting crap on facebook and having 3 conversations going at the same time. Plus, its 24 fuckin' questions....

The 6 question quiz took less than one minute to complete.